Moms Making A Difference

Green Living: Paige Wolf is Eco-Friendly

by Jamie Moesser

Paige Wolf is green. Quite green. So green that she wrote a book about it. It’s called Spit That Out: The Overly-Informed Parents’ Guide to Raising Children in the Age of Environmental Guilt.

She wrote it to make life easier for moms who are trying to do a good job raising their kids while also being green and environmentally-conscious. Making green living easyis her color, her cause, and her career.

About the book, which was recognized in such publications as The Huffington Post and People.com, she says:

“In addition to the age-old daunting task of raising happy, healthy babies, mothers are constantly bombarded with new and contradictory research concerning environmental toxins, long-term product effects, and the far-reaching impact of every product we purchase and decision we make. Spit That Out!answers the questions posed by mothers on the verge of a “green mom nervous breakdown” and turns to experts to present facts, debunk myths, and help parents stay on a reasonable and responsible course without losing their minds.”

She came up with the idea to write the book when she was pregnant with her first child and felt compelled to do in-depth research on real-life eco-friendliness with kids. She does, in fact, have a degree in English/Journalism from the University of Delaware, where her work at the newspaper and campus magazine helped to earn two Pacemaker awards, the “Pulitzer prizes of student journalism.” Before she was an author and a mother, she was a journalist, publicist, and communications manager. Writing comes naturally to her.

In 2002, she started her own PR firm, through which she helps “promote manageable eco-chic living.” She works with clients who contribute to a sustainable world and positive change. The firm is the first and only certified B Corporation public relations company in the Philadelphia area, meeting comprehensive and transparent social and environmental standards. And for every printed copy of Spit That Out! that’s sold, a tree will be planted, through a partnership with Eco-Libris. She is serious about being green.

But she’s also realistic, like Sommer Poquette, who we talked about here. Paige says: “I am certainly not the greenest person around—not even the greenest person I know! But I try my hardest to be as green and healthy as possible without making myself—or others—crazy. Sometimes this means not bringing my own mug to Starbucks or letting my toddler eat Cheese-Its for dinner. I can’t claim to be perfect, and perfect should not be anyone’s goal. However I believe we can always do better. That’s why it’s my goal to seek out practical, manageable, and affordable solutions to greener and healthier living!”

Some might say she’s lucky, having success while touting something that is often perceived as inconvenient or expensive. Regardless of what one believes about global warming or pollution, it’s hard to deny the ever-present need to be responsible with what we have. As the Roman statesman Seneca once said: “Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity.” An opportunity exists to show the way to be environmentally responsible easily and inexpensively. Paige Wolf, because of her own preparation and publication, is, by that definition then, quite lucky.

You can find out more about Paige at SpitThatOutTheBook.com or PaigeWolf.com, on Twitter at @PaigeWolf, and Facebook at PaigeWolfPR.

Moms In The News

Breastfeeding moms in uniform photos spur debate

(CBS/AP) SPOKANE, Wash. - The Washington National Guard and Fairchild Air Force Base say two nursingmothers were wrong to be photographed in uniform breastfeeding their babies. 

The photos were taken and posted on the Internet by Mom2Mom, a group on base that supports breast-feeding mothers. 

The photos immediately prompted debate online.

Mom2Mom posted on its Facebook page that the "photographs were NEVER meant to exploit, promote or to use the uniform to help our group," and the goal was to promote National Breastfeeding Awareness Week in August.

One of the mothers pictured in the photos, Terran Echegoyen-McCabe, told NBC, "I'm proud to be wearing a uniform while breast-feeding. I'm proud of the photo and I hope it encourages other women to know they can breast-feed whether they're active duty, guard or civilian."

But state National Guard Capt. Keith Kosik says it's a violation of regulations to use the uniform to promote a cause. He says the Guard members will likely not be disciplined but that it would be used an opportunity for education.

Base spokesman Maj. Randy Bailey says there's no issue with moms in the military breast-feeding, but campaigning in uniform is not allowed.

The base is near Spokane, Wash.

Inspiration Of Motherhood

Crib notes: Is this generation of moms too overprotective

By Dana Macario

The world often feels like a big, scary place. As parents, it's our job to do everything we can to protect our kids. But, some are beginning to worry that our fear has led to over-protection, which means kids are living more sedentary lives -- lives that aren't healthy for them. We know that previous generations of kids had a lot more freedom to roam; to walk to and from school alone, to play around the neighborhood in the afternoons, and to just generally get out and run on their own. These days, kids are more likely to be driven to school and to hang out at home, watching TV after school. As the childhood obesity rate continues to rise, many say that our fears of letting kids out of our sight is partly to blame. As the Globe and Mail reports, free-range kid activist, Lenore Skenazy, has said “Your fear ... is putting your kidat risk of something far less dramatic, like obesity ... and something that’s more likely to happen than getting snatched off the street.” Do you think we're exercising appropriate caution, or are we, as a generation of moms, being overly protective?

In a video that will make you cry, inspiring kids cheer on their classmate who suffers from Cerebral PalsyAll too often, we come across stories of kids being bullied and picked on because they're different. So imagine our delight when we came across this incredible and inspiring video of a group of fifth and sixth graders. At a track and field day in Ohio, one boy, who suffers from Cerebral Palsy, decided he was going to run the 400-meter race with his classmates. What, for most kids, is a fairly easy jaunt, was a real undertaking for this young trooper. In a video that Babble shared, you see him struggling along on his own, after the other kids sprinted off. Then, something incredible happens. First, his gym teacher joins him and walks along side him. That kind teacher is soon joined by one kid, then four, and before you know it, everyone's stopped what they were doing and are running along with Matt W., chanting "Let's go, Matt, let's go." Are you crying yet?

Little boy trades a toy soldier for a trip to Disney World, then gives it awayIf the last story hasn't convinced you how amazing kids are these days, this next story ought to do it (and yeah, there's a chance you might cry again). The story of Brendan Haas is the story of a little boy who traded in his toy soldier for a trip to Disney World -- a trip he donated to the family of a fallen soldier. Several months ago, nine-year-old Brendan heard about a guy who started with a red paper clip and kept trading it for bigger and better things until he eventually traded his way into a house. Inspired, Brendan started the "A Soldier for a Soldier" project, where he traded a toy soldier for something bigger and better, eventually trading his way to a trip for Disney World. Aswhdh.com reported, he managed to convert that little, toy soldier into tickets to Disney World, air fare, a stay at the Disney Villas, and almost $900 in Disney gift certificates. Then, he did something amazing, he gave it all away. He held a raffle and gave the trip to the family of Lieutenant Timothy Steele, who was killed last August in Afghanistan. Lieutenant Steele had left behind a wife and a two-year-old daughter. That little girl, who's already lost so much, will at least get to take a break from it all and have a fun vacation. Brendan, we salute you.

Grandma gets sued for falling while carrying her granddaughterThey say that no good deed goes unpunished and that certainly seems to be the case for one Australian grandmother. While on a family vacation six years ago, a grandma offered to take her granddaughter downstairs after the baby wouldn't go back to sleep after an early-morning feeding. The granny asked her daughter (the baby's mom) to leave her bedside light on as she went down the stairs, but didn't turn on the light in the rental house's stairway, for fear of waking other family members. But the grandma stumbled and even though she grabbed for the railing, she still fell down the stairs, holding the baby the whole way down. Tragically, the baby was seriously injured in the fall and is now severely disabled  as a result. As the Australian reports, the little girl's parents have now sued the grandma for negligence and the court sided with the parents, deciding that granny was liable because she didn't turn the stair lights on.

Toddler grounded. Another kid who won't be flying the friendly skies anytime soonWhat is going on with kids and planes these days?! Are kids really more out-of-control than they used to be or are airlines less tolerant of small children? Yet another toddler has been kicked off a plane for being what his dad describes as "cranky." As KIRO FM reports, the dad describes a three-year-old who was crying and not wanting to put his seatbelt on before takeoff. The little boy's mother, who was seated elsewhere, eventually came over, giving the boy some water and his pacifier, settling him down. By then though, it was too late and the Alaska Airlines pilot had already turned the plane back towards the gate. The grumpy tot and his dad were then asked to leave. The airline claims it was a judgment call and says the crew was worried because the little "boy did not want to sit upright and keep his seatbelt on." The airline offered to book the family on a later flight, but the family took a pass on that offer. Do you think airlines are being too tough on families with small children these days or are parents just blaming the airlines for their kids' bad behavior?

Dana Macario is a TODAY Moms contributor and Seattle mom to two sleep-depriving toddlers.

Helping Single Moms

Bay Buchanan, speaking up for single moms

By Melinda Henneberger

Murphy Brown — the newsgal played by Candice Bergen on a show that went off the air in the 90s — is the perfect target for tut-tutting about single moms. Since she doesn’t exist, neither she nor her rarely-glimpsed son are in any danger of getting their feelings hurt, or wasting a minute worrying about what you think of them.

Actual single mothers, on the other hand, with actual kids to raise, may not benefit from the old and ongoing criticism that raising a child on one’s own is a terribleidea.

Twenty years ago, conservatives cheered when Republican Vice President Dan Quayle lectured that “Bearing babies irresponsibly is simply wrong...We must be unequivocal about this. It doesn’t help matters when prime-time TV has Murphy Brown, a character who suppopsedly epitomizes today’s intelligent, highly paid professional woman, mocking the importance of fathers by bearing a child alone and calling it just another lifestyle choice.” In the Post last week, a Brookings Institution economist resurrected Murphy and recommenced the finger-wagging over her, declaring that ”it turns out Dan Quayle was rightabout Murphy Brown and unmarried moms.”

No, he wasn’t: Murphy Brown wasn’t in any way “mocking the importance of fathers,” and the “lifestyle choice” in question was one conservatives applaud. The pretend baby was fathered by the character’s fictional ex-husband, and when he flaked out on her, surely Quayle wasn’t saying she should have had an abortion or given up her child.

Just as unexpected as this blast from the past, though, is the moving and intensely personal new book from Bay Buchanan, whose “Bay and Her Boys” makes precisely the opposite point — and challenges her fellow conservatives to see the self-fulfilling aspects of the drumbeat that single parents and their progeny are pretty much doomed to fail.

Buchanan was traditional, true-believing and devastated, she says, when her husband walked out on her while she was pregnant with their third child. But was she supposed to just give up at that point, and accept the “wisdom” that her children would be forever hobbled by having grown up without a father on the premises?

“Shortly after I became a single mom,’’ she writes, “I began to take note of a continual stream of bad information coming my way. New studies were constantly being released on the impact that fatherless homes had on children — and I’d watch fellow conservatives take to the talk shows, armed with the latest statistics, to make their case. The evidence is overwhelming, they would argue, a dad in the home is critical to the healthy development of his children. The picture they painted was frightening. I’d start to worry all over again that I couldn’t give my kids a childhood as good as my own.’’

Buchanan’s three sons are grown now, and turned out more than fine. But it’s disheartening to see how the judgments she’s written about persist, even as we continue to expand the idea of what constitutes family. Why is that? Buchanan told me she thinks some on the Right have been “afraid to go any further and say, ‘Single moms, you can do this,’ for fear it would undermine their original argument” about the importance of marriage and family.

Just as unexpected as this blast from the past, though, is the moving and intensely personal new book from Bay Buchanan, whose “Bay and Her Boys” makes precisely the opposite point — and challenges her fellow conservatives to see the self-fulfilling aspects of the drumbeat that single parents and their progeny are pretty much doomed to fail.

Buchanan was traditional, true-believing and devastated, she says, when her husband walked out on her while she was pregnant with their third child. But was she supposed to just give up at that point, and accept the “wisdom” that her children would be forever hobbled by having grown up without a father on the premises?

“Shortly after I became a single mom,’’ she writes, “I began to take note of a continual stream of bad information coming my way. New studies were constantly being released on the impact that fatherless homes had on children — and I’d watch fellow conservatives take to the talk shows, armed with the latest statistics, to make their case. The evidence is overwhelming, they would argue, a dad in the home is critical to the healthy development of his children. The picture they painted was frightening. I’d start to worry all over again that I couldn’t give my kids a childhood as good as my own.’’

Buchanan’s three sons are grown now, and turned out more than fine. But it’s disheartening to see how the judgments she’s written about persist, even as we continue to expand the idea of what constitutes family. Why is that? Buchanan told me she thinks some on the Right have been “afraid to go any further and say, ‘Single moms, you can do this,’ for fear it would undermine their original argument” about the importance of marriage and family.

So instead, they act like you might as well keep the TV on all night and “have marijuana for dessert,” she added, “because the message is never, ’You can do this.’ ’’

Now we have Isabel Sawhill of Brookings reiterating this same tired script, writing in an op-ed that “Unless the media, parents and other influential leaders celebrate marriage as the best environment for raising children,” “the new trend — bringing up baby alone — may be irreversible.”

Well if we’re not already celebrating marriage, building our social and legal lives around it, then how come gay couples want in on the action? Has anyone ever disputed that two committed, in-residence parents are ideal? It’s doubtless even better if you have Grandma next door, your brainiac aunt the classics major on call for tutoring, and healthy food grown out back on the table every night at 6, after a moment of prayer.

But back on this planet, I love Buchanan’s feeling that for her, the first step in succeeding in spite of the naysayers was seeing and presenting her situation as a blessing, and announcing to friends, “Hey, I’m a single mom now!” as if she’d won the Lotto. Not because she was glorifying the breakdown of the family, or whatever nonsense phrase critics trot out, but because if she dragged around thinking she’d drawn the black bean in life, how could that attitude have been anything but harmful to her kids?

From the moment a pregnant woman starts to show, she is treated to all sorts of contradictory input from strangers and intimates, moralists and economists. (And most knowledgeable of all, of course, are those who don’t have children themselves; I used to be that smart.) These days, however, my only advice is: You can do this.

Melinda Henneberger is a Post politics writer and anchors the paper’s ’She the People’ blog. Follow her on Twitter at @MelindaDC.

A Working Mom Making A Difference

Andeisha Farid, Executive Director of AFCECO

Andeisha Farid is the founder and Executive Director of Afghan Child Education and Caring Organization, AFCECO (www.afceco.org). She was born in 1983 in Afghanistan, on the day when the former Soviet jets ruined her village in to rubbles and forced the entire community to leave their homeland and take refuge in Iran. Andeisha’s parents settled at a camp in Iran, where there was no school. Andiesha moved to Pakistan to stay at a hostel there and while studying in the refugee camp, she made the decision to tutor Afghan widows and children who had no place to learn.

In 2002, Andeisha moved to Islamabad to continue her education at the university level and there she began working with a local Afghan community, first as a teacher, and later as administrator and spokesperson of an Afghan school. Touched by the misery of Afghan street children in Islamabad who couldn’t attend school, Andeisha collected fund from the local community to establish a safe place where street children could come during the day.

After building a reputation she became known to CharityHelp International (CHI), a US non-governmental organization. With assistance from CHI Andeisha was able to open her first orphanage in Pakistan, and in short time to see her dream grow. While she was only 24 started a new non-profit, the Afghan Child Education and Care Organization (AFCECO). Today, AFCECO runs 11 orphanages in Afghanistan and refugee camps in Pakistan with 600 children of diverse ethnicities and has employed nearly 200 people who are mostly widows and university students.

Andeisha made a worldwide recognition in a short time. She was honored 2010 Global Leadership Award of Vital Voices (www.vitalvoices.org) and The Goldman Sachs & Fortune Global Women Leaders Mentoring Award at Fortune Most Powerful Women Summit 2010. Brian Williams of NBC Nightly News made many stories on Andeisha’s works which resulted her with hundreds of sponsors and supporters in the US. Andeisha was also invited to attend a summit on entrepreneurship hosted by Barack Obama, where the President found her story compelling enough to mention in his speech to the entire community: “Andeisha Farid, an extraordinary woman from Afghanistan, who’s taken great risks to educate the next generation, one girl at a time. Together, they point the way to a future where progress is shared and prosperity is sustainable”http://www.youtube.com/charityhelp#p/u/0/eSbe9x0PZ44

In the face of extraordinary adversity and the challenging climate she faces in Afghanistan today, Andeisha acts as an integral part of her country’s efforts to rebuild, educating the next generation of leaders who will lead their nation forward. In addition to providing children a safe and nurturing environment, Andeisha’s AFCECO instills important leadership values of tolerance and an appreciation for education in Afghanistan’s future generations. In this way, Andeisha believes that AFCECO’s principles and policies better position their children for future success, and on an even greater scale, enabling them to shape to a more tolerant and prosperous future for Afghanistan.

Military Moms

By Pamela Sitt

Military mom 'proud' of breastfeeding in uniform, despite criticism


Is breast-feeding while in uniform conduct unbecoming to a military mom?

The debate over nursing in public got a new layer recently, when photos taken on an Air Force base began to circulate online. In the series of tasteful professional photos showing beaming moms as they nurse their kids, one jumps out: the photo of two servicewomen with their uniform shirts unbuttoned and hiked up to breast-feed.

"A lot of people are saying it's a disgrace to the uniform. They're comparing it to urinating and defecating [while in uniform]," says Crystal Scott, a military spouse who started Mom2Mom in January as a breast-feeding support group for military moms and "anyone related to the base" at Fairchild AFB outside Spokane, Wash. "It's extremely upsetting. Defecating in public is illegal. Breast-feeding is not."

It was Scott's idea to ask photographer Brynja Sigurdardottir to take photos of real-life breast-feeding moms to create posters for National Breastfeeding Awareness Month in August. One of the moms photographed in uniform, Terran Echegoyen-McCabe, breast-feeds her 10-month-old twin girls on her lunch breaks during drill weekends as a member of the Air National Guard.

"I have breast-fed in our lobby, in my car, in the park ... and I pump, usually in the locker room," she says. "I'm proud to be wearing a uniform while breast-feeding. I'm proud of the photo and I hope it encourages other women to know they can breast-feed whether they're active duty, guard or civilian."

She said she's surprised by the reaction to the photos, which also feature her friend Christina Luna, because it never occurred to her that breast-feeding in uniform would cause such a stir. 

"There isn't a policy saying we can or cannot breast-feed in uniform,"  Echegoyen-McCabe says. "I think it's something that every military mom who is breast-feeding has done. ... I think we do need to be able to breast-feed in uniform and be protected."

The Air Force has no policy specifically addressing breast-feeding in uniform, according to Air Force spokesperson Captain Rose Richeson, who added, "Airmen should be mindful of their dress and appearance and present a professional image at all times while in uniform."

Robyn Roche-Paull has been advocating for such a policy since she left the U.S. Navy 15 years ago. Her challenges in breast-feeding her son while on active duty – she recalls her "flaming red face" upon being reprimanded for nursing in a medical waiting room – prompted her to write a book called "Breastfeeding in Combat Boots" as a resource for military moms. She is now an International Board Certified Lactation Consultant who remains close to the military through her active-duty husband and her blog for military moms.

"If you follow the comments on my blog, a lot of the comments are that the breast-feeding mothers are the ones who need to be covered up. Nobody sees anything wrong with bottle feeding mothers or fathers," she says. "Asking mothers to feed a baby by bottle when they are together, simply because they are in uniform, can both affect the mom's milk supply and her willingness to keep breast-feeding or stay in the military. It's simply one more barrier they have to face."

The criticism of the photo goes beyond the usual nursing-in-public debate, though. One commenter on Roche-Paull’s website who identified herself as a retired captain in the Marine Corps said she advocated for breast-feeding moms in the military and now, as a civilian, she nurses freely on base. However, she writes:

“I would never nurse in uniform. I took my child to the bathroom or a private office when her nanny brought her to me …. Not because I was ashamed of nursing, nor of being a mother. All the guys knew I pumped. The military is not a civilian job. We go to combat and we make life or death decisions, and not just for ourselves but for those we lead. The same reason I would never nurse in uniform is the same reason I do not chew gum, or walk and talk on my cell phone, or even run into the store in my utility uniform. ... We are warfighting professionals. Women before us have worked too hard to earn and retain the respect of their male peers. I don’t want my Marines to look at me any other way than as a Marine. When I am asking them to fly into combat with me and do a dangerous mission, I do not want them to have the mental image of a babe at my breast. I want them to only see me as a Marine. Let’s be a realistic folks. We give up many freedoms being in the military…Breastfeeding in front of my fellow Marines was one of them."

Another commenter on the blog replies:

“There is N-O-T-H-I-N-G more authoritative than a strong mother standing tall breastfeeding as she barks orders. It’s AWESOME that you’ve worked so hard promote breastfeeding, but I think you *might* be selling yourself short.”

The women in the photo have given some thought to the whole question of military versus maternal duties. To those who believe breast-feeding in uniform undermines the authority of a female officer, Echegoyen-McCabe says:

"I guess my thoughts are, if you don't want to breast-feed in your uniform, you don't have to. But you should have respect for those who do. ... If anything, it should make people look at you as someone who is able to multitask."

What do you think? Sound off on our TODAY Moms Facebook page.

Pamela Sitt is a champion multitasker who lives in Seattle. She blogs about motherhood on her website, www.clarasmom.com.

Moms In The News

Nation's Moms Invent New Recreational Drug To Worry About

MAY 10, 2012 | ISSUE 48•19

DENVER—A new illicit drug that is incredibly cheap, highly addictive, and extremely easy to produce is appearing in school yards across the country, the fevered imaginations of the nation's mothers who need something to fret over confirmed today.

The totally contrived drug that in no way exists in any objective reality and is only real in the minds of mothers is known by its street name, "scramp," and according to moms who previously did not have enough actual things to worry about, a batch can be made from everyday household supplies such as sugar, window cleaner, and petroleum jelly.

As recently as last week, the nation's moms created a completely fictitious scenario—the sole purpose of which was to worry themselves sick—wherein household glue could also be used to create scramp.

"Right after my husband and I agreed our son was responsible enough to drive on his own, this scramp epidemic comes along," 39-year-old mother of two Gayathri Bhowmik told reporters as she wrote a letter to her senator demanding stronger legislation against the scramp menace that grows each day in her mind. "I've heard all the kids in his class are doing it. They have big 'scramping' parties where they go to the house of someone whose parents are on vacation, and they take scramp all night and it turns into a big drug orgy."

"It's only going to get worse," Bhowmik added of the scramp scourge that is not happening.

Mothers whose concerns for their children's safety has veered into a mass hysteria said teenage users ingest scramp either by licking it, swallowing it, smoking it, snorting it, injecting it, or putting it under their eyelids in order to experience sensations of euphoria, bodily dissociation, dizziness, and a unique altered mind state that cannot be easily described because it is not a physiological reality.

• TIPS

  Talking To Your Kids About Drugs

Additionally, mothers who feel the need to lose sleep at night say that any amount of scramp is capable of causing a fatal overdose at any time.

"My oldest has been coming home from school and going straight to his room," said Dubuque, IA mother Debra Verhulst, who just last month began allowing her 15-year-old son Alex to date. "He sits in there for hours on end, doing God knows what. Sometimes he's really hungry, but sometimes he's not hungry at all, and when I ask him if he's scramping, he just rolls his eyes and tells me he doesn't know what I'm talking about. He never used to talk to me like that."

"It must be the scramp,” added Verhulst, her eyes welling up with tears at the thought of her child's fabricated problem with the fake drug. "My son is a scramp-head! What did I do wrong?"

Despite the shared delusion that scramp is virtually undetectable and that any young person could be on it at any time, mothers said there are still telltale signs your teen could be scramping, including lethargy, too much energy, untucked shirts, watching an hour or more of television a night, staying out past curfew, and questioning authority.

A recent poll found 95 percent of overprotective mothers with children between the ages of 12 and 18 are aware of the completely made-up drug, and 73 percent are "pretty sure" at least one of their kid's friends has tried it. In order to combat the fictional scourge, the recently formed group Mothers Against Scramp Abuse (MASA) has published a pamphlet titled "Talk To Your Kids About Scramping" and sent it to hundreds of churches and youth organizations nationwide.

"We must work together to keep scramp out of our schools before our children become just another statistic," said MASA founder Helen Perry, whose 14-year-old son died of scramp-related causes in her imagination three months ago and again last week. "Just look at what happened to Tim Kepler, a 17-year old Boise boy who I heard jumped from a radio tower after trying scramp just once. These scramp pushers will stop at nothing to get your child to take their poison, and once they do, your kids are hooked for life."

With incidents of scramping up 3,000 percent over the past year in the minds of thousands of American mothers, use of the nonexistent drug has prompted mothers to wonder if they can ever truly protect their children

"Today, it's scramping; tomorrow, who knows?" Perry asked. "Dooping? Frazzing? Heroin? Quockling? I just want my baby to be safe from these kinds of terrible drugs until he goes to college and I have all sorts of other things to worry about."